"The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective." James 5:16
I have been wrestling.
Wrestling with Direction. Desire. Selfishness. Fear. Worry. Control. The Unknown.
I wish I could say I have answers to these things, but at this point, I don't.
I am an open book with most things, but in recent days, I have been sorting through things in my own heart and life quietly. I think my fears speak louder than truth most days.
I have felt challenged in my own life and in my quiet time with these words that will not leave my mind "Pray Through."
I've been thinking about what this means for me.
It means, my prayer life needs work.
It means it's exactly what I should be doing with all these struggles I listed at the beginning of this.
It means praying until there is a breakthrough.
It means praying until there is an answer.
It means consistently, fervently praying until there is peace.
It means not giving up just because I don't have the answer today.
It means believing in God's faithfulness and His promises to me.
It means running to God first with the worry before going to someone else.
It means spending uninterrupted, devoted time sharing my heart with the Lord.
It means being honest about where I'm at, trusting that He will be faithful to complete the work He has started in me.
I have been reading various scriptures in relation to prayer, and Luke 18 is a perfect example of Jesus teaching his disciples about prayer and never giving up.
Luke 18:1 (the message) reads:
18 1 Jesus told them a story showing that it was necessary for them to pray consistently and never quit.
It was never promised to me, or any of us, that life would be easy. In fact, the Word tells us that it is going to be hard.
Honesty says there are times right now when I feel the answers aren't going to come, or maybe it won't be what I want it to be, but this is when I need to practice praying through.
One of my favorite verses is found in Philippians and it reads:
Philippians 4:6-7 The Message (MSG)
6-7 Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.
While I can quote most of these scriptures, and have heard them over and over, sometimes I'm not sure its truth is as deeply embedded in my heart as it should be. I wish I could share and give voice to all it is that I am sorting through in my heart and mind right now, and maybe in time I will be able to. I do hope in time, that I will be able to share just how God answered these prayers.
I usually write/post something when I have the whole picture to bring forward. Today is not that day. I felt there might be someone that needed to read this, and maybe if its you, just know- that if your searching, wrestling, or waiting on an answer. You're not alone. Maybe you feel like your prayers are hitting the ceiling, or maybe you wonder if God even hears you when you cry to Him with your deepest desires, just know He is listening. And He hears you.
I know my prayer life can use some work.
I am practicing praying through.
I hope this continues to change me in the waiting.
It is never an easy place to be, but there is beauty in this process.
I know and believe He hears me, my questions, my fears, and my desires. I am trusting that in His perfect time, He will answer.
If I can pray for/along side you in something, I would be honored to.
If you find yourself in the waiting, you're not alone.