"You hold my world in Your Hands"

"I waited patiently on the Lord, He turned to me and heard my cry."

Overwhelmed. Tired. Impatient. Selfish. Frustrated. Anxious. Nervous. Weary.
These are all words I would use to describe myself over the last few weeks.
Not something I am proud of, it's just honest.
300 miles an hour seems to be the pace of my life these days.
In the business of my life in the past couple of weeks, I have often failed to take time to tell the Lord everything that's going on. To invest my time where it matters.

Last night, I had the opportunity to just stop.
To be still.
To be honest & real.
To worship.

"Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need."
Hebrews 4:16

It's amazing what God will do when you seek Him.
During the worship service last night, I couldn't help but to be overwhelmed by the presence in the room. It was inevitable. What a feeling.
But more than a feeling, and more than an emotion, there was such a realness to my experience last night. The last time I felt somewhat like I did last night, and that type of encounter with the Holy Spirit, was 4 years ago at NYC.

I distinctly remember His presence.
I remember the clarity that I had in my head and my heart.
I experienced that same presence last night.
We sang about all of it...all the names of God were flashed on the screen before me.

The greatness of God. His healing power. His grace. His mercy. His love. His forgiveness.His understanding. His patience. His plan. His strength. His security.

When I began to think of all these names and what each of these meant for me personally, I was overwhelmed by the faithfulness of God in my life when I have many times turned my back, and done my own thing.

His love.
He's been teaching me about this so much in the past year, and it's amazing that I see new aspects and depths of His love for me everyday.

They encouraged us to be real with God. With everything.
It wasn't long before I was pouring my heavy heart out to the Lord.
It wasn't even that I said anything out loud, but the weight of my heart & the things on my mind that never seem to quit racing in my head, were slowly still.
Almost as if someone put a pause button on my life and stopped everything in my world just for a few minutes where nothing else mattered but that moment.

With my eyes closed & my hands reached out to heaven telling God everything, I was silenced in my own heart & mind. His face was before me in my mind, and clear as day The Lord looked directly into my eyes and gently said -
"Bethany, My love will sustain you. I'm here."

For all the moments that I've felt alone, wanting comfort, or just an embrace that says "it really is going to be okay, you're gonna make it. You can do it!" I literally felt like my entire body was being held closely. Wrapped so tightly that I could barely breathe.
What a sweet moment.

I cannot begin to tell you the power of that moment in my life at this time.
The Lord has been so good to me, and I am so grateful that at times in my weakest moments, and times of great need, if we seek Him, he promises that He will show up.

I didn't want this encounter to end.
His presence was real. Alive. I was immersed in it.
Peace.

While it may not be an experience like this everyday, or every worship service, I was reminded of the sweetness of His presence, the addiction, the satisfaction, the comfort, the perspective that His plan puts on my life, the incomparable joy and peace that comes when you just rest in His arms.

I pray that like me, You will press into the Lord & everything that He has for your life.
He holds everything in His hands.
I pray that I never become satisfied, but continually hungry for the Lord & His presence.

"Nothing is impossible for You...You hold my world in Your hands."