Tuesday Night Thoughts

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Right now I find myself tucked away in a tiny quiet corner of a local coffee shop. I can hear laughter across the room from a group of ladies here for a book club meeting, there are two students studying for what sounds like a chemistry exam next to me. The warmth inside this old house that is now a coffee shop was inviting as it is 34 degrees out. The baked goods and coffee won my heart over and were exactly what I needed on this Tuesday night.

Well, if you're wondering, I'm not in Florida. The snow flurries here this morning were a harsh reminder of that fact. Andrew and I made our way up to Nashville this past week as he was in a friend's wedding. We always love our time to come back up here to visit. I must say though it is always bittersweet.
Tonight I just needed some time to decompress, to soak in everything from the past few days, to prepare myself for what is ahead and waiting on me at home, and really just to breathe.
While this trip was busy, it by far has been one of my favorite times.
While I hate that we did not get to see as many people as we wanted to, there were a lot of things this trip that caused me to stop, think, and truly to be thankful.
Andrew and I did our premarital counseling while we were up here with a counselor that I have great history with. While it is never easy to be in the 'hot' seat to hear truth, I felt so blessed, encouraged, and excited about all the Lord has ahead for Andrew and I as we continue into this season of marriage. 
I had a chance to reconnect and spend quality time with one of the sweetest friends I have. God truly has shown me grace in this relationship and I am so grateful for that. 
While we were coming and going, and it was what felt like non-stop the Lord has been near to me this week.
I realize my struggle to live in the moment.
While I have been here and even now in this very moment as I am typing away, I feel the hurt in my heart deep down for the things we miss here, for the friendships that are separated by miles, and for the hurt that comes whenever change takes place. While not bad, I would be lying if I said it was always easy.
I also realize my desire in moments here that I have and the excitement and joy of sharing wedding plans and talking about what I may do after I graduate a year from may. At times, wishing the next 8 months away. 
Regardless of the variety of emotions and feelings that have been on my mind and heart during the past week, I realize that I struggle to live in the moment.
The Lord this week has shown me and reminded me of His faithfulness in my life. 
I have said it multiple times but never feel like I can say it enough but I had no idea how life changing coming to Trevecca would be for me.
I had no idea that God would shape and mold me as He did. I couldn't even begin to fathom the valleys I would walk through, but I also had no idea all the great things I would take away from my experience during my season of life here in Nashville.
As I am preparing for marriage, and even in counseling this week, it is hitting me more and more everyday that soon I am going to be a wife. I cannot wait for this day and all that it will be. 
I feel like I have so many emotions running through my mind right now and I'm not even sure this post will make sense, but if I can say one thing, it's this.
God has been so faithful to me.
I often wonder if He will ever lead us back to this place and deep down, I hope at some point we will be here. Regardless of location, I am confident that the Lord will continue to work in my life and bring to completion all He has started.
I'm thankful for the moments I experienced this past week.
For a change in schedule.
For the chance to reconnect.
For the chance to grow and be reminded of where, how, and why I fell in love with Andrew.
To prepare for the days ahead as a married couple.
To share in real genuine discipleship and prayer with a sweet friend.
To laugh and enjoy company.
To just take a deep breath.

There is something so special about this place.
It has my heart and tonight my heart is full.

1 comment:

  1. As I have said so many times, God always proves to be faithful, in hard times, in questioning times, in broken times and in stretching times, still He remains the same, Always faithful. So completely confident that He has your best interest at heart and that He loves you more than I could ever be able to, and in that I rest and watch the next few months and even years.... unfold. I love your heart and I love you.


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