Maybe Being Needy Isn't Such a Bad Thing

Monday, October 8, 2012

Being considered "needy" isn't ever usually seen as a positive thing.
However, in the last couple of weeks I've realized that being needy
has actually been a positive thing for me.

Right now, I feel needy.
Every part of my life has been changing. 
New job, moving back home, new school and classes, etc. 
It's all new. At times, it's still scary. I don't always feel prepared. 
I'm needy.
Needy for what?
Patience with myself.
A purpose that is bigger than what I am capable of seeing right now.

I've noticed myself praying at work more than I have in an entire week.
Confession: that's terrible, but true.
I've found myself in a vulnerable place trying to find my footing in everything I'm doing.
My mentality. Just survive.

Not the ideal mode that makes me thrive, but at this point its like you jump in the deep end and learn how to swim.
I miss being comfortable.
I struggle with confidence.

So what am I learning through all of this?

I appreciate quiet moments now more than ever.
If it's peaceful, I want to be there.

Quoting scripture in my head has become vital to making it through my shifts at work.
Clinging to God's promises prevent me from living in fear.
Believing that God's purpose for my life is not only for the moment here, but that He is preparing me for what's next allows me to go into each day striving to bring my best.
Being needy for God has pushed me to get back into the word, to focus my mind on the right things, and to grow closer to Him everyday....

It certainly isn't easy, but feeling needy for God has been a blessing.

"I will never leave you nor forsake you."

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